Sandwiches will be provided

Oh will they!  Well maybe I can’t eat sandwiches because I’m a Coeliac (which means that I’m intolerant to wheat and gluten – gluten is the food substance that binds foods together).  Actually the word ‘intolerant’ doesn’t seem to do the condition justice as it’s technically a disease (Coeliac Disease).

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that bad, I end up eating more fruit and veg than I would otherwise – joy! But if I did eat bread or pasta now it would come straight back out again, one end or another, so repellant would be more accurate than intolerant.  This immediate and severe reaction is why people refer to it as a food ‘allergy’ I suppose.  So what to do about the situation, well the answer is avoidance of all things wheat. So what happens when sandwiches are provided?

Salad is requested I guess. I’m just not used to being a minority and therefore not accustomed to pointing out my specific requirements, but then maybe that’s how the suffragettes felt back in the day.

Any Other Business

I started a new job six weeks ago and it’s been as chaotic as starting any new job always is.

Today was a milestone though.  I heard what I hoped was a myth about a guy who used to work at the company as a Project Manager, who had a little episode shall we say and was escorted from the building.

I’m sure this kind of thing happens in lots of places of work.  It’s just that now when I glance around the large open plan office, listening to ‘Insania’ by Peter Andre through my headphones; I almost see a ghost of him. I can’t help wondering what it was like.  For all the people here at the time and for him.  Do any of them still ever think about it?  Who intervened?  Where did it happen, at my desk?

I hoped it was just made up by one of my team to scare me so I asked around, but it turns out it’s no myth, it did happen.  Shit happens, in any and every business I guess.

I just can’t help wondering who will be next here…

Welcome to the Hotel Maccy-cleod

[Instrumental: Sandra on violin]

On a dark Morden highway, southern wind in my hair
Warm smell of beef stroganoff, rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a shimmering light
Number 8 Wessex Avenue, as my sight grew dim
I had to stop for the night

There Sandra stood in the doorway;
As she heard the sound of the bell
And I was thinking to myself,
This could be heaven that I can smell,
Then she lit up the hall light and she showed me the way
There was Christine’s voice down the corridor,
I thought I heard her say…

Welcome to the Hotel Maccy-cleod
Such a lovely place
Such a lovely face
Plenty of room at the Hotel Maccy-cleod
Any time of year, you can find it here

Her mind is Tiffany-twisted, she got the Mercedes Benz
She got a lot of pretty boys and girls that are her friends
How we dance in Oceanna, sweet summer sweat
We dance to remember, the next day we forget

So I called out to Sandra
Please bring me my wine
She said, we haven’t had Lambrini here since nineteen seventy-nine
And still those voices are calling from far away,
Wake you up in red pyjamas in the middle of the night
Just to hear them say…

Welcome to the Hotel Maccy-cleod
Such a lovely place
Such a lovely face

Always livin’ it up at the Hotel Maccy-leod

What a nice surprise, bring your burger and fries.

Ode to the best Hotel I have ever stayed in and the two wonderful managers Sandra and Christine, my very good friends x

The Polar Express

Our world does look beautiful covered in white.

Thanks to the snow, on the train this morning I looked out onto untouched Christmas card scenes through the window.  The beauty of trees shape and form come to life, the ground looks soft and bouncy and the sky looks like Narnia sky.

The snow may be a pain in the train timetable but it’s certainly stop-in-ur-snow-tracks-beautiful. This morning, as far as I’m concerned I didn’t ride to work by Southern Rail, I rode the Polar Express all the way into London baby!

S’now good

Like many, I couldn’t get into work today because of the train disruption due to snow. And if I had, I probably wouldn’t have made it home anyway.

So my office window on the world today is looking pretty snow-filled (still snowing now actually at 2.30pm). Let’s hope it gets better tomorrow; not holding my frosty breathe too much though.

Small mercies: I had milk stashed in the freezer, time for another cuppa and back to my webmail me thinks!

Get real (time) man!

Back at the dawn of time, we amused ourselves with live performances, okay so some of these were actually gladiatorial fights but real-time theatrics nevertheless.  Later came live television broadcasts, with black and white coloured men speaking to us with terribly English accents.

Now, we have real-time global conversations on Twitter. Real-time conversations that any of us can join in with, talking to people from all pockets of the world, on subjects that we are all passionate about – this is huge!

No longer are we just entertained, talked at or dictated to, we are now the agenda setters, the producers and the critics.  We can eavesdrop, amplify and repeat these conversations as much as we like.  And what’s more, it’s legal and it’s free!

If ever there was a time to have your say and to listen to what is being said, it’s now.

Question is: where do you feature in these conversations?

Check out what people say about me at my Twitter feed.

Make choices, don’t drift

January is a time to stop putting things off, to make decisions and to take action.

With this is mind, it’s worth remembering that everything that doesn’t kill us is good for us. And that the universe will only bring us challenges necessary for our personal growth.

Arguing on trains

Mostly it’s annoying to listen to people talking on public transport, let alone argue; but sometimes it’s quite fascinating.

The other day this old couple (in their sixties) actually got on the train arguing, quite loudly in posh voices – brilliant!  You could practically hear all the other passengers ears prick up to listen in.  One guy actually told his kid to be quiet so that he could hear.  I slyly removed my earphones and stared out of the window blankly.

“I’m sorry Charles but I didn’t realise that we were to bring that bag, you didn’t tell me…”

“Let me finish, just let me finish!  It’s got my spare shoes and my medication in it.”

“We’ll both go bare-feet, that’s fine, it’ll be rather fun.  But what about your medication?”

“Don’t go on about it, I’ll be fine.”

“But..”

This is just the gist of it, but you get the idea.  They managed to spin the conversation out for at least two stops.  And that’s not it, I then realised that they had two other people with them, who were just sitting next to them in silence listening to the whole episode.

The older man and woman seemed so unaware that everyone in the carriage could hear them, that you almost felt that you were imposing on their private space.  How do posh old people do that? But now I feel involved, what will the old boy do without his spare shoes and can he really do without his medication all day?

2010: A Space Odyssey?

What happens when you arrive in the future?

The film ‘2010′ (made in 1984) sequel to the 1968 film ‘2001:A Space Odyssey’, excited us all as to how crazy it would be to live in the future.

It promised us a place full of jet-packs, hover boards and thought-controlled equipment. But now that it’s very nearly upon us, I fear it may not be this way. This is a shame. We have failed in our progression, surely. Why have we not come further?

In terms of human evolution we had Dolly the sheep, impressive but not exactly a mass of new life forms.  In terms of technology we have twitter and Wi-Fi and touch-screen yes, but thought control is a big fat no. And in terms of artificial intelligence, the best we ever had was the X-Files.

I fear the year 2010 will not be the Space Odyssey I once thought it would be, but it is the future and so I am excited about what possibilities it will bring.

Christmas socks

Warning!

You move your Christmas socks around in the drawer all year, only using them if the washing situation gets really desperate and then you hope that nobody spots them. So…DON’T FORGET to wear them on the big day.

You probably have more than one pair, how do decide which ones to wear?  Simples!  Wear one on each day from now till New Years, you can get away with it.  If you still have some left over, then wear two pairs at once (it’s still pretty cold) and then swop around the outside pair at lunchtime.

Happy sock-wearing time one and all! x